Boston mommy blogger

The Original Gender Reveal: Birth

Marc and I decided very early on, even before we found out we were expecting, that we wanted the gender to be a surprise. When we announced our pregnancy one of the most common questions, if not the most common, was ‘when do you get to find out the gender??’. We received our fair share of blank stares when we said we didn’t want to. I realized pretty quickly that not finding out the gender is definitely not the norm nowadays, and many people don’t quite understand why we would choose to limit ourselves. My own future in-laws made a comment about “taking the fun out of it” by not wanting to know the sex… but how will you pick a name? How will you know what clothes you need to buy? So you’re just not going to decorate a nursery? And my all time favorite remark: “So what am I supposed to get you for a gift?”

Bassinet: here // Insert: here // Panda: here // Narwhal: here // Moccasins: here // Onesie: here // Sweater: Zara

I actually had a coworker tell me he couldn't gift us anything since he didn't know the gender and it made me feel quite awkward… because I suppose it was sweet of him to think of us, but I really wasn’t expecting anything, yet it wasn’t nice he made me feel bad for not finding out the gender, so screw him… I think?

It can be difficult to plan for your first baby when you don’t find out the gender while living in a hyper-gendered society. Pink or Blue, Daddy’s Princess or Mama’s Boy, Trucks or Unicorns, and the list goes on (and on and on and on).

So why did we do it?

Because it made every single day of our pregnancy that much more exciting. We had sleepless nights just discussing name options, we got to pick out two names not just one! I would look over at the empty bassinet to the right of me and just imagine a tiny baby in there, I didn’t care if it was a boy or girl. We had no expectations, which is probably the biggest pro in not finding out the sex. Also, it was fun to watch people squirm when you said you weren’t finding out the gender. It’s like I said I was pregnant with a dog. Everyone has so many opinions and you get so much unwanted advice, it really is nice to have this one thing that no one can take from you.

Another lesser known pro? We totally spent less money while planning. Every outfit we bought we loooooved and would look totally adorable on a girl or boy, which means less money to be spent on the next pregnancy too! Our bouncy seat? Gender neutral. Crib? Gender neutral. All the adorable, cozy, cream colored baby knits? Gender neutral.

Even our going home outfit was gender neutral (though I did buy just one hair bow just incase we had a girl, which turned out to come in handy). I put some money to the side to use on clothes once the baby came and did know the gender, it was very easy to wait. And truthfully, if we had a boy, I wouldn’t of really needed anything ‘gendered’, I’ve never been one for dinosaurs and trucks. But I’m biased because baby girl florals are my favorite.

Lastly, that moment when they laid Florence on my chest and announced she was a girl was the happiest and most exciting moment of my entire life. We had a daughter. A daughter!

There’s no right way to do it. This was our path and we loved every second of it and are so excited to get to do it again.

If you are considering not finding out the gender, just make sure your choice is based on what you want to do and not at all what friends and family (and coworkers) want for you. Haters gonna hate.

I can’t believe my little Flora Faye was in there <3

I can’t believe my little Flora Faye was in there <3



Becoming a Mom

Motherhood has completely taken me by storm.

Swaddle   here    //  Bow    here      //   Pacifier clip        here

Swaddle here // Bow here // Pacifier clip here

It’s not that I don’t feel like I have the time or energy to shoot anymore, it’s just that being with Florence has completely triumphed everything else in my life. I could scream it from a mountain top, “I LOVE HER” . Being a mom freaking rocks. I feel like I (very painfully) birthed a best friend/ life-long buddy. She makes everything better. I mean besides the whole pumping 10x a day thing, that I could be done with. But for her? Yeah, I’d do it 12x if I had to.

… And I’m definitely not trying to act like I have this whole motherhood thing down pat, I don’t. It’s haaaaard. Draining. Exhausting. But somehow, so unbelievably worth it.

After lots of DMs through Instagram I thought it was about time I share her birth story. I’m only 4 months late!


Florence Faye

Jan 17, 2019 - 5 lbs 11 oz - 19 in - 3:49pm

It twas a cold and dark winter night on January 16, 2019, Marc and I were off to our 38 week ultrasound. We were warned 2 weeks prior that there was a small and very unlikely chance we’d be induced at our follow up ultrasound due to the fact Flora was on the particularly small side (11th percentile). They told me to pack a hospital bag just in case. And I’ll be honest, I did, but… I basically didn’t. I think I threw a toothbrush and a nursing bra in there. I was just in such denial that I was having a baby still. I was the worst planner. Nonetheless, I brought my very liberally packed bag and we were off. To our surprise Florence dropped from the 11th percentile to the 3rd in a matter of 10 days and just like that we were sent to labor and delivery to be induced.

EMOTIONS.

We made our rounds of phone calls to family and friends, I changed into that weird yet surprisingly comfy gown thing and up the catheter with an inflatable balloon went (ouch). Yeah you might not want to google that…

About 3h later, around midnight, I started getting contractions and that went on until about 7am when they removed the horrible contraption only to notice I didn’t dilate at all (they told me I’d most likely be at 4-5 cm in the am) SO THEY PUT IT BACK IN (double ouch). And if that wasn’t bad enough they also gave me an IV of Pitocin to move everything along.

And then the real fun began. I stupidly thought I was superwoman and told my midwife I didn’t want an epidural, I have a high pain tolerance, I said. Silly, silly me. Contractions got worse and worse and I went from laboring on the floor, to the shower, to the tub, anything to relieve the pressure in my back. I started to beg for the epidural only to hear my Midwife tell me it wasn’t in the birth plan. Thankfully I had my mom there (who birthed 6 kids of her own) coaching me and of course my loving and supportive fiancé, who I think still has PTSD from the whole ordeal (sorry love).

Hours went by and I was stuck at 5-6cm in what felt like an eternity. Feeling completely defeated, in tears, soaking wet from the tub, I finally felt that incredibly powerful urge to push (despite the Midwife’s urging tone not to), and in just 3 pushes my lovely Florence Faye flew out at 3:49pm weighing in at 5 lb 11 oz.

And despite everything you just read I immediately forgot all the pain, the long labor, the third degree tear Florence gave me as a parting gift, and I just felt my baby girl on my chest and knew I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.

Childbirth was the most rewarding and humbling thing I’ve ever done. I feel proud I did it the natural way, not to brag and sound like I’m better than everyone, but it gave me such an appreciation for women. Women have been giving birth for thousands of years, with 99% of that was spent without the help of medicine. Those women in the 16th century who had 10+ kids? LIKE HOW? Women are AMAZING. And I’m not going to lie, I feel amazing, and empowered, and more beautiful than I’ve ever felt having Florence in my arms. Despite the loose skin, extra fat, leaky boobs, and tired, makeup-less eyes.

Childbirth is magical.

S/O to my mom for also doubling as my birth photographer. I will cherish the images forever.

S/O to my mom for also doubling as my birth photographer. I will cherish the images forever.